CREATING FROM PASSION

When I start writing or painting I never know what my new work will be. It is always a deep moment of calm and then opening up to what is coming. Sometimes this is the first word, the first brush stroke and for a moment the confusion of the mind that knows nothing what is happening. Then I take a deep breath and open it even more, until my mind goes away for good. I used to learn arts at school. It was a drama for me.
I kept asking myself how to learn art from others? I do not want to paint like others. I want to paint and create the way I want. I quit painting for a few years. I did not go to art school. I’ve closed the creation of art. After almost ten years, I started painting again. I gave up everything I learned in schools. I started painting abstraction paintings completely in my own hands. Inspiration came from me and not from others. I do not create from the mind. Everything I create flows directly from within me. It was a massive breakthrough in my life, to realize that everything flows from me. I’m not looking for things outside anymore. I’m not interested in what colors people like, whether they like it or not. What is now created is completely mine without any restrictions and expectations. I create being in the flow of my consciousness, what arises far goes beyond the mind and the perception of the mind. Sensitive people feel it, and there is no need to explain anything more. Closed people will be looking for techniques, colors that have been used and comparing my creations to other artists. But this is mine and only mine. It is a great feeling to begin to create in a great unknown for the mind and to finish the work in the full understanding of what it is and the deep knowingness that the work is finished. Neither more lines nor less.
This picture is an expression of pure passion of creation without limits, restrictions, and expectations.
It is amazing that by creating seemingly small things in this state, miracles begin to happen. I painted a small piece of linen, and the phones rang. The old things that stopped one day suddenly began to come back to life again. The creation of this image has caused a great change on all levels of my life. This is how energy works, how we create from the passion of our soul, not from the ego mind.

 

Acrylic painting size 16”x20”

If you like it you can buy it! This painting is for sale 🙂 You can see more of my paintings on my Instagram account: http://instagram.com/oreandrus

 

Hubert

FEAR OF MYSELF

I was afraid of my wisdom… All my life I tried to be kind to others and diminished myself to fit society. I was scared to be myself because I was afraid that I would not be accepted by others. Lack of acceptance meant lack of self-love. I was looking for love outside of myself. As I fit into society, it means that others accept me and I can love myself. If my thinking, wisdom, knowledge went beyond the limits of the average person, I pretended to be a fool, and I would do ridiculous things just to hide. My sense of humor and entertainment was a cover before showing myself in full, in being transparent, of being WHO I AM.
As I realized that what I hold in my heart is my greatest treasure, diamond, uniqueness that I can share with others and that I do not need anyone’s acceptance from outside. And that I can love myself unconditionally, that I do not need any confirmations from the outside world, from other people. Then I saw my grandeur, greatness, dignity, self-esteem.
I also saw the same beauty in other people and fully accepted them as they are without judging. Without comparing them to each other and that they are exactly where they should be. I do not want to change them. I felt great love, gratitude to all people and deep joy and lightness.

Finding Yourself

I was searching and trying to find myself very hard. I felt very deep inside me that I am much more than what I see. I tried to find love outside me, and I tried to find abundance outside me. Everything that I wanted in my life was outside of me. I was trying to find the way out from limited human reality. I set goals, procedures, techniques, meditations, and I read all the possible books. I was great in theory, but it just kept me away from me even more. I was frustrated, after a while from the rest I tried to find myself again, and again.
I was frustrated and still searching for myself, for real fulfillment. I was continually looking for the missing puzzles that never fit together and were still missing something. When I was exhausted and gave up all attempts, I just had no more strength for it, and then everything suddenly started happening better than I expected. When I saw it, I tried to get involved again and improve the result by working on it. Then everything was fucked up again. I repeated this pattern thousands of times, for many years. I never had what I wanted, and I was always separated from what I wanted.

After many years, I realized that I was playing a mind game that is impossible to win, and it never ends. This game never gives a sense of fulfillment and real satisfaction.
I tried to get to know myself, my divinity through the prism of my mind. The mind has an insufficient spectrum of reality perception. Everything is simplified. The mind created goals, objects of desire placed far in the future that never happens.
All life always happens in the now moment only. There are no exceptions.
The question is, are we blind to the majesty of real life that is happening now or do we dream the illusions of a better life that will occur somewhere in the future?

We say YES, of course, we want to live now…

But at this moment we realize that there is nothing beautiful here at the moment, it is definitely not what we would like to experience. There is no money, no love, no enlightenment, no body what we would want. We see a simple gray everyday life that is merely boring, or full of problems and desires.
It is impossible that this boredom is unique and beautiful.
And then again, we start to repeat our search. We do not feel right where we are. Still, we expect something better. We begin to dream, hope and plan. We are drowning again in the illusion of a better future that never happens.
We are again in conflict with the life that is happening now and our expectations of what it should be.
The end of this painful mind game is to accept everything as it is, no matter how seeming it looks. Is it beautiful or ugly, pleasant or unpleasant… it is labels…. it is just as it is.

One of the most profound words: “All is well in all of creation.” express the end of searching, judging, struggling, and achieving illusionary objects from the mind.

And so it is!

Hubert

Safe Space

I do not know if anyone more than I appreciated the safe space in life. From an early age, I lived in a fictitious world, the world of my imagination. When other children played with each other in the playground, I separated myself and created a safe space in my head, an entirely different world in which I exist almost as much time as in the real world.

When in the primary school we moved with the family to a new home, I quickly got to the attic. I cleaned up all the lumber that lived there and created my first real safe space. To get to me, the family had to overcome many stairs, so hardly anyone appeared there. In the gate to the attic, in the staircase, I drew huge paintings that expressed me. On the main wall at the entrance, I drew a plant growing high with the eye instead of the inflorescence. Under the drawing, I wrote: “Look at the world from a different point of view.”
In this room, I was discovering spirituality, and I was hiding my first books, I talked with God and Angels. I experienced the first love, and I built friendships.

I lived like that for several years, but even the safe space in the family home became too small for my soul at some point. I could not find myself in being an obedient daughter. My parents gave me a lot of freedom anyway, but I needed more. When I was 15, I got to Krakow, 60 km from Oświęcim – my hometown. Then I unconsciously began to release my family ties. I lived in a boarding school for girls and came home only on weekends. It was a real mixing of energy, very necessary at that moment to be reflected in my roommates like in mirrors. We lived in five in one room, each of us had a strong personality, and none of us interfered in the life of another.

After finishing high school I found a school in Warsaw, not knowing the city, nor having any person close to me, I went to the capital. I lived in student apartments, and it was another dose of freedom. Too far from the family to go on weekends, without old friends. Everything was new and free. I had a great room where I could develop my occult interests. It seemed to be my path then, now I know it was just a staircase to see that the world is much more mysterious. I grew bigger and more open to my gifts – intuition, imagination, a feeling of energy. I met the shamans, talked to ghosts, meditated.

In retrospect, I see how important it was in this life. Everywhere I went, I broke away from the bond. More and more. I grew up alone, which was the greatest gift for me. Later I wanted to be close, stable, fell in love and closed in a space of my husband for several years. There was no old me, I stopped dreaming, I stopped talking with Angels. In the husband’s apartment, everything was his and on his terms. Even if I smuggled something, it was a compromise and it was not really mine. Stuck. I felt bad, I slowly disappeared, but it seemed to me that if I love someone, it is so necessary. I accepted hundreds of compromises, I entered my husband’s energy completely, I stopped leaving the house, meeting people. It was a strange time to lose myself. One day, broken and destroyed by endless quarrels, I sat on the couch and floated away into my world of imagination. The world of safe space from childhood. It was so easy for me and so forgotten. I felt like I found the way to myself in an instant. In my safe space I was still there. I WERE, regardless of the circumstances and who I became as a wife, I was still intact there. It changed everything.

I remember how I breathed the fresh air when my husband was already showing me a flat for renovation in which I could live until I sorted out the divorce. I saw ragged walls illuminated by the sun. I saw my new safe space, and it shone a thousand potentials for me. I did not see the broken walls, and I saw the furniture, the beds, my son’s colorful room, but the most beautiful was the luminous road leading straight to itself, to self-development, to awakening consciousness.

A safe space is invaluable for a human who wants to open himself. It is the opening of the gate.

If we want to feel the true self, experience the master who lives inside of us, we must separate ourselves from the energy of others. Go to the forest, live alone, create from scratch your safe space, so that in the womb you can grow without turbulence. This time, however, having only oneself and taking only what is ours.

When we create a world around us on our terms or find a place where we feel at home, we naturally start to open.
For the first time, we open ourselves completely. Nobody bothers us, so we grow, and fly to our mastery.

AN

Ecstasy – Here and Now

The mastery is not sacred, it continually gets into new situations, it is continuously reflected from human nature, and it returns with consciousness to its place. And more naturally, being a Master, we are also a human being. It is time to move away from the illusion of a Master who is never wrong, and his world is impeccably organized into an ordered whole.

Master does not need to arrange or order anything. He does not need to be overly sweet, just as many people think.
Master draws wisdom from everything and does not categorize the world for better and worse.
The master knows that everything is well in all of creation because he realizes that he is the creator.

Many times I exchanged energy with others, incomprehension, even sometimes I entered into a moment of anger, and I do not consider it as something “bad”, but only for something that was supposed to appear, for me or someone else. To show us something, teach something, ground something. The human in me still has the ego and the mind and probably never get rid of this. Unconditional love to myself, gives me love for all my creations in everyday life and understand them more. Often it gives me a lot of funny situations. Everything matters to me if it is manifested in my life. And I know very deeply that it’s all GOOD for me.

At the same time, I am still living in a state of ignorance. I do not care about the world. I do not distinguish between politicians. I do not know what the weather will be tomorrow. In general, I do not care about it, because my life is HERE and NOW. The great delusion of the world is a life in a continuous past and future. Banal, but how much misunderstood by the world.

When the past touches us, we feel our wounds of the past, our worries, they rule our mind. We can not enter of pure NOW. Our head is still busy with something from the past. Looking to the future, most often with fear, we are afraid of what may come, what will happen to us, how others will react to our actions – it paralyzes us in NOW. It works like a constant tug of war – it does not give you truly free.

Maybe you ask – how to do it? How to live in now? The answer is simple – stop controlling, start allowing everything. But of everything! NOT ONLY FOR WHAT COMFORTABLE FOR YOU. At the beginning, it can be difficult, because the mind does not want to get rid of control for anything in the world. He feeds himself from control and power. How do you stop controlling your love or your employees, your organized day? The world will fall apart!

However, in small steps, when we allow less and less control, we become less drawn into the mind games until we become truly confident and confident in our creations and more and more free. It’s starting to lead us something much more significant – consciousness. And most importantly, we are beginning to live in HERE and NOW more and more. And it is not fake. It is something authentic. This is exactly what the Masters do in their lives every day – they ALLOW. Even if (seemingly) something disturbing happens in our lives, the Master knows well that it happens for some reason, and later when we notice the whole, the hardship of this situation disappears as if it never existed. And you can laugh at it, as loud as you can.

Such a life is extremely pleasant. It is like devotion to ecstasy, abandoning everything in the name of freedom and pleasure. Boundless immersion. Total acceptance of the experience. Release. Ecstasy. Nothing interests you, you are in this beautiful state and everything is going smoothly, without your intervention, without control. A very similar feeling arises when two lovers are completely open to each other, and every touch releases all the brakes. Losing yourself in the moment for the sake of pleasure. The same energy is created in the real being in HERE and NOW. You feel it, you lose yourself in being and in life. Everything becomes easy because you do not have to think about anything. Somewhere under your skin, you know that the world serves you, and you can be detached from the human world, you can fly.

Free Yourself from Control. Free yourself from the delusion of what your quest for developing consciousness should look like. It will look exactly as it should look, not better and not worse. So why fight it? You can only allow. To give in to it with lightness. Be in a state of divine grace. Continue in ecstasy.

And so it is.
AN